Proverb-a-day for January 25, 2012

by on Jan.25, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Eccl 8:14 There is a vanity which is done upon the earth; that there be just men, unto whom it happeneth according to the work of the wicked; again, there be wicked men, to whom it happeneth according to the work of the righteous: I said that this also is vanity.

Eccl 8:14 There is a vanity which occurs on earth, that there are just men to whom it happens according to the work of the wicked; again, there are wicked men to whom it happens according to the work of the righteous. I said that this also is vanity. NKJV

Let us continue with the thought from yesterday, why bad things happen to good people and why good things happen to bad people. Consider this related verse: Prov 12:21 There shall no evil happen to the just: but the wicked shall be filled with mischief. (And Ps. 91:10)

In scripture, what appears to be a contradiction is usually an enticement by the Spirit of God to draw us into deeper study, greater understanding, and a broader perspective. That is the case here. From the limited human (under-the-sun) perspective, it makes no sense when good people suffer, seeing that they devote themselves to doing the right things. But in God’s eternal perspective, it is true that “no evil happen[s] to the just,” because God is conducting the entire symphony of eternity that includes both major and minor chords blending them together to make a complete and perfect orchestral composition. If it looks like an evil thing is happening to a just person, reconsider that God is working all things and redeeming all things for good. What the devil intends for bad, God makes good of it.

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Help my marriage! (part 11)

by on Jan.25, 2012, under Marriage

A man’s success as a husband hinges upon the relationship stated in:

1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

For the sake of order in the marriage relationship, God set forth a hierarchy of management. Men must acknowledge Jesus Christ as the head of the relationship. In this situation, two heads are not better than one. Man must submit his will to God’s will.

Further, men are called to be sober-minded.

Titus 2:6 Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, Sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you.

The Greek word, sophron, is used in both verse four and six. Both men and women are called to sober-mindedness. The meaning of that word goes farther than just not being drunk. In addition to meaning curbing one’s desires and impulses, being self-controlled and temperate, the word also means, of sound mind, sane, in one’s senses.

To make a marriage work, marital partners are to staying away from the sort of things that lead to drunkenness and out of control behaviors—such as alcohol and drugs. But also to keep a sound and self-controlled mind. Husband, keep your sanity and do not try to be a teen-ager again. Wife, put a harness around your emotional fluctuations and reach for stability.

When both are working toward soberness, it makes a much better relationship.

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Proverb-a-day for January 24, 2012

by on Jan.24, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Eccl 8:14 There is a vanity which is done upon the earth; that there be just men, unto whom it happeneth according to the work of the wicked; again, there be wicked men, to whom it happeneth according to the work of the righteous: I said that this also is vanity.

Eccl 8:14 And this is not all that is meaningless in our world. In this life, good people are often treated as though they were wicked, and wicked people are often treated as though they were good. This is so meaningless! NLT

Today Solomon mentions another mystery of life: “Why do bad things happen to good people?” and the corollary question, “Why do good things happen to bad people?” These are related to the previous mystery of verse eleven, “Why do the wicked triumph?” Much has been written about this in books and sermons through the ages, but the root answer boils down to this: trust God. For those who truly trust in the sovereignty of a loving God, we can re-interpret confusing circumstances through the lens of trust. Job’s misguided friends believed that the reason that Job the righteous man was suffering trouble was probably because he was not really righteous, but secretly sinning. However trust in God asks a different question:  “What if your blessings come through raindrops? What if Your healing comes through tears?” (“Blessings” by Laura Story) The blessing may be the pain. An unhealed sorrow in one area may be the very thing that will connect you to a great blessing in another area. More next time…

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Proverb-a-day for January 23, 2012

by on Jan.23, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Eccl 8:12-13
12 Though a sinner do evil an hundred times, and his days be prolonged, yet surely I know that it shall be well with them that fear God, which fear before him:
13 But it shall not be well with the wicked, neither shall he prolong his days, which are as a shadow; because he feareth not before God.

The last time we introduced the first of three mysteries that Solomon undertakes in the remaining part of chapter eight—the mystery of how the unjust seem to triumph. Our inner self does not want the villain to win in the end. We have a sense of justice within us (placed there by God) that wants good to win and bad to lose so it is a mystery when the opposite seems to be true. However, in today’s verse, Solomon sets the record straight—the wicked may prevail for a short time unpunished, but those who do not fear God will find that their wickedness will catch up with them. Ultimately wicked deeds will lead down a path where it will no longer be well with them. That is putting it lightly. Unrepented wickedness will lead to a severe and fearful judgment (Hebrews 10:27-31).

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Help my marriage! (part 10)

by on Jan.23, 2012, under Marriage

A spiritual home

We have been talking about the need for the presence of love in a relationship—love for God and mutual love for each other. The next topic is the spiritual home.

There are several dimensions of a spiritual home. In a spiritual home, unity, compassion, and tenderness are present.

Philippians 2:3-4 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

This attitude arises out of placing the Word of God as a center piece of the family. Dr. Pitirim Sorokin of Harvard University conducted a survey of spirituality in homes and reported:  “Where the family practice of Bible study and prayer is observed daily, there is only one divorce in every 1015 marriages.” (I lost the reference.)

Consider that we generally consume three meals per day, or roughly twenty-one per week.  Consider how many spiritual meals you take in in balance? And this involves more than just a sermon on Sunday. Your spiritual consecration should not solely depend on church attendance. That helps but is not all there is to spirituality. Making time for the Word of God for your family on a daily or at least regular basis will plant spiritual seeds in your family’s hearts that will not go away.

Attend church regularly with your family.  Volunteer for the church.  Make it a lifestyle. Pay your tithes regularly and teach your children to come the importance of putting God first in both time and finances. In other words, practice Christianity in your home. Serve the Lord at home as though He is the Master of your home.

Josh 24:15 And if it seem evil unto you to serve the LORD, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for me and my house , we will serve the LORD.

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Proverb-a-day for January 20, 2012

by on Jan.20, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Ecclesiastes 8:11 Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is fully set in them to do evil.

Eccl 8:11 Because the sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, the hearts of the sons of men are fully set to do evil. AMP

We were addressing the first of the three mysteries that Solomon undertakes in the last part of chapter eight: the mystery of how the unjust seem to triumph. Today’s verse explains why that perception is prominent. It is frustrating how that some people continue doing wrong year after year and they do not get punished for it. Because their judgment does not come speedily, they continue in that error with a false sense of safety. “I won’t get caught and I won’t stop.” If we are in a position of authority and we are responsible for judging errors, we must keep this verse in mind as we seek a balance between longsuffering and judgment. The answer is not easy but if we pursue godly wisdom, we can find help to handle even this tough mystery.

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Help my marriage! (part 9)

by on Jan.20, 2012, under Marriage

Ask yourself, “Am I willing to invest the necessary energy to come to a new relationship with my mate, one less crippled by unreal expectations, one more shaped by who we really are?  Can I change?” Maturing love finds a new level of intimacy because the couple is more comfortable with the balance of strength and weakness they find in their spouse and themselves.

Marital love is subject to the marriage vows and the Word of God. Rather than making marital love a complex thing, husbands can break it down to this simple formula: I love her because (1) She is my wife, and (2) God said Husbands love your wives.

A wife may ask it this way: Why should I love him? Because he is my husband, we have pledged our lives to each other, we are bound together by God’s Word and by our vows, he is the father of our child, we are accountable for our life together before God and men.

Ideally, love will be expressed through both our feelings and will.  But sometimes a conflict arises between the two. In such instances, which one will take the lead?

For example, when feeling tempted into an extra-marital relationship (affair/adultery), it becomes the will that leads, not the feeling.  One must respond to temptation like this: “I will express my love to my wife by faithfulness when tempted.”

The Book of Proverbs provides strong warnings against the long-term dangers of marital infidelity:

Proverbs 6:26 For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread: and the adultress will hunt for the precious life.

Proverbs 6:32-33
32 But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding: he that doeth it destroyeth his own soul.
33 A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away.

For men, one way to handle the flirtations and temptation of a beautiful woman is to think about her this way:

Proverbs 11:22 As a jewel of gold in a swine’s snout, so is a fair woman which is without discretion.

That verse explains that the woman who flirts with you husband may be highly attractive, but she is just a dressed up hog if she is flirting with a married man. And you cannot blame her if you fall. You are not innocent.

Proverbs 6:29 So he that goeth in to his neighbour’s wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent.

We should practice enforcing our will by saying “I love you” every day, despite changing feelings caused by moods, health, disagreement, problems of the day. Do this by an act of your will as an act of faith. Your words then need to be followed by works.  God will honor your faith as you look for the flow of “felt” love to come from God.

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Proverb-a-day for January 19, 2012

by on Jan.19, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Eccl 8:10 And so I saw the wicked buried, who had come and gone from the place of the holy, and they were forgotten in the city where they had so done: this is also vanity.

Eccl 8:10 I have seen wicked men buried, and as their friends returned from the cemetery, having forgotten all the dead man’s evil deeds, these men were praised in the very city where they had committed their many crimes! How odd! TLB

Solomon moves on from leadership skills to another topic: mysteries of life. Life is full of mysteries—things unexplainable to humans. Like how eating a one pound box of chocolates causes you to gain three pounds; or how brain cells die and are not replenished but fat cells live forever. Seriously now, in the remaining verses of chapter eight, Solomon describes three such mysteries of life. The first is how the unjust seem to triumph. At the funeral of a person has lived a vile and corrupt life, how many of his villainous ways are described in his memorial service? When the wicked are buried, people tend to “forget” or gloss over their evil deeds and even praise them. Solomon says this is vanity. In other words, “Should not the wicked be punished?” We will look at this again next time.

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Help my marriage! (part 8)

by on Jan.19, 2012, under Marriage

Our subject is maturing love—love that goes beyond looks and feelings. Think back to your twenties. Or if you are in your twenties, ask yourself this question. Could you fall in love with a 70 year-old? I can hear myself at that age saying, “Ooooh, gross! No!!!” Well, just hang in there. If you allow your love to mature and follow God’s plan and stick with your mate, you will be 70 one day and will still be in love as you are now, only at an even deeper level. It is deep love that causes a partner to continue to be faithful to their marital covenant after their mate is disfigured by a stroke or accident.

That demonstrates that mature love is much more than a feeling. Sometimes the emotions that you feel toward your spouse are not be characterized as charming, blissful, pleasant, enjoyable, satisfying and agreeable. Sometimes the emotion will be anger, resentment, annoyance, irritation, fury or rage. The strength of the biblically-based marriage is that rather than being sustained by the seasonal streams of our own feelings, it is based on a command.

Love flows out of our relationship to Jesus as we obey His command, “Husbands love your wives.” The expression of the will through commitment can change infatuation and immature romance into a love that sustains marriage.

Not only does mature love last, it also grows over time. Committed love grows as we are able to acknowledge and appreciate our spouse as is. We can become disillusioned when we begin to feel that “She is not the woman I thought I married.” Or “He is not the man I thought I married.” However, when we commit ourselves to our spouse as s/he is not as we thought s/he was, we can move on from that disillusionment.

A powerful revelation about marital love is that our love for our mate does not grow because they are becoming what we want them to be, but because we begin to accept and appreciate who they are. The sooner we give up our effort of trying to remake our spouse into our perfect idea of a spouse, the sooner we can begin to develop mature lasting love. Maturing romance involves reassessment of the “perfect spouse” image we have been so insistent on reshaping our mate into.

After marriage, our goal should not be to make your partner better, but to make your partner happy.

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Proverb-a-day for January 17, 2012

by on Jan.17, 2012, under Proverb-a-day

Eccl 8:9 All this have I seen, and applied my heart unto every work that is done under the sun: there is a time wherein one man ruleth over another to his own hurt.

Eccl 8:9 All this I have seen, and applied my heart to every work that is done under the sun: There is a time in which one man rules over another to his own hurt. NKJV

At the end of the previous verse was this warning: “neither shall wickedness deliver those that are given to it.” Last time we described the leadership quality of humility. The verse ended with a warning for those who lack it. And as the backdrop of today’s verse, it is apparent that some in leadership positions, quite arrogantly, feel that they may be able to escape unharmed if they mistreat those who work under them. No, it does not work that way. Our footprints on the path of wickedness will ultimately be discovered. That is the nature of wickedness. That boss may think that he can step on someone else to bring about his own rise on the corporate ladder, but in the end, it is a time that ruling over another will bring hurt to him as well. The act of taking unfair advantage or oppressing vulnerable employees under you will bring you down. Do not even thing about going down that path.

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